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    1/28/2008

    歌,唱给自己听

          转眼又过一年,跳跃着,蹦跶到了2007年的最后,等春节,换一个生肖。

         翻翻自己的space,总是在年尾的时候有大段的文字,其余的时间,总没有那么多要说的话,或者说没有那么多值得写的话。于是,从2005年建了这个space到2008年,完成这篇文章,我的space里文章少得可怜;并且,只有在我感觉有很多话要说,很多心里的感触要倾诉的时候,我才会在这里写,因此,这里的东西又让人感到我的阴暗面。

         其实,我在校内也写东西,但那里的东西某种意义上讲,是给别人看的。而这里的东西则献给自己和我真正的朋友。有些事,有些情,有些感慨,有些忧伤,不值得与他人分享,不希望朋友分担。

         因此,我说,我习惯寂寞。

         不要误解了寂寞和孤独。寂寞是每个人都要面对的,是人和自己的灵魂独处的时间。漫漫长路,总有某一段,某一刻,是要自己承担责任,自己做决定的。在这样的时候,即使人潮熙攘,你会忽略周遭一切,听命于自己的灵魂。即使朋友、亲人陪你一生一起走,你也要自己为自己做出最终的抉择。人,终究要对自己负责。

         某些时候,谈到寂寞,总有人让我看开点,快乐点。其实不然,寂寞不是什么劫难。更多寂寞的时间,给了我更多思考的动力。思考的力量是强大的。我更多思考着我的世界,我的未来。思考是痛苦的。这种痛苦是对自己进一步认识的必然。痛苦和痛苦必然不同。别种痛苦让人迅速被自己侵蚀,这种痛苦让我坚定而安静地继续。

         2008年,我又在迷茫。虽然我给自己不断鼓劲,但我对自己的前路的不明朗总有些担心。

         但是无论怎样,我还得继续。我坚信,我可以征服交错的生命线。

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    晓菁 郭wrote:
    Hold on!
    在未来很久一段时间过后再回头看看现在
    感觉会很不一样
    Jan. 28

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